A Note From the Santa Monica Teen & Family Therapist
Did you know that the parent-child connection is often at the heart of a teen’s willingness to cooperate, and adhere to the limits? – Sandra
Too frequently, I see parents using punishment to influence their teen’s behavior, often resulting in power struggles and resentment – on both parts. It is also not uncommon for parents to repeat the parenting responses they saw modeled by their own parents.
In my Effective Parenting of Teens Classes, I teach parents about secure and insecure attachment styles, and how to apply this knowledge in their relationship with their teen. Each week, we work on very practical applications of this knowledge with examples from their day-to-day life.
I help parents slow down, and become curious about what their teen’s behavior may say about what they are needing in that moment. Although it is appropriate to set boundaries and have expectations for a teen’s behavior, it is also important to teach them alternative ways of responding to their challenges.
Successfully navigating the adolescent phase of life involves setting boundaries and enforcing consequences without becoming punitive, angry, or judgmental. Respectful parenting means being able to see the frustrations teens encounter when pushing against imposed boundaries as opportunities for them to exercise self-control, self-respect and respect for others.
Parents need an environment where they feel understood, and not judged. Therefore, kindness and empathy in supporting parents is essential. In discussing sensitive topics, as the therapist, I have a wonderful opportunity to give parents a direct experience of what responsiveness and sensitivity to their teen can look like.
If your teen or young adult child is struggling socially or emotionally, I can help you to discover the cause and remedy it.
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SandraDupont.com
Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor
Providing service for: Los Angeles, Santa Monica, Pacific Palisades, Malibu, Beverly Hills, Beverly Glen, Culver City, Brentwood, Westwood, Marina Del Rey, Mar Vista, Encino, Sherman Oaks, Topanga Beach and Topanga Canyon, Ocean Park, Hancock Park, West Hollywood.